Tuesday, August 7, 2012


My parents think that I am so lazy. My mom gets a mini heart attack when mid terms and finals come because she thinks that I take exams lightly. She would be surprised if she knew how hard I had to study for sociology and statistics last semester! My dad gets worried when I cannot answer in Filipino. He thinks that I am too lazy to learn the language or that I am not interested at all. What he does not know is that I have tried my best, but Filipino and I just cannot seem to get along. My mom thinks that in about three years I will be out of college, looking for a job when I realize that I was really meant to be an educator. My dad, on the other hand, thinks that by the time I graduate I would be thinking, 'Why did I not move to Singapore?'

My nieces and nephew think that I am the most amazing person that came to live with them. Ada, Te'a and Gusto think that I am their babysitter, their storyteller, the person who spoils them with candies, the human being who can finish their Kumon worksheets and their living iTunes who has to sing The Man Who Can't Be Moved a million times to them. As soon as I am done with school, Ada wants me to have children so she has playmates. Te'a just wants me to grow my hair longer and make it look like a rainbow. Gusto, well, he is two and all he thinks about is food.

My friends think that I know how to write. Ever since grade school I have been doing their english homework, making their speeches, proof reading their essays and even editing their work. They do not even ask me to please to help them. They just dump their work on me and expect me to work magic for them. They also think that because I am in media production that I know how to shoot music videos, do voice overs, make scripts and edit films. Then they get the grade and the credit and I get the sleepless nights and the headaches. My friends say that after college, they think that I will be this person who can come up with an idea and execute it.

Society thinks that I am proud and sassy. They think this because I came from La Salle College and I am now in Assumption. For many people, Lasallians are proud, arrogant and boastful. And the girls from Assumption are sassy. Put that together and you have got the most self absorbed, conceited person. Society dictates that by the end of my stay in college, I should know everything there is to know and learn about media production. I should be able to name dozens of communication theories, come up with a storyboard in less than an hour, be an expert at staying up late to cram the editing of videos and know who directed what movie and who starred in it.

In reality, I am Anna Fernandez Morales. And right now I have forgotten my speech. But I do know that I am lazy, opinionated, happy, content, hyperactive and sleepy. Why am I in this course? I am in this course because this is all I have known my whole life since my dad brainwashed me with his words and art to be in the same field he is in. Three years from now, I will be as lost and as disoriented as I was on the first day of college. I will still wonder if I was meant for this course of I can really write, direct, edit or even come up with a concept. But I know that wherever I will be three years from now is exactly where I should be. 

* I had to do this speech for my oral communication class. The guide questions were something like, Who are you? Why are you here? Where are you going?' And I thought to myself, 'Screw that! I'll make my speech go in circles so that I can just say that I really have no idea where my life is going.' And it worked! =) 

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